HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Goldie Gown

My fanatical thrift-shopping friend, Babe of Belltown, is forever gifting me with fabulous finds from his fashion forays! He's given me some great stuff over the years....like my silver leather trench coat, for instance...he knows The Gams goes for The Glitz! So, true to form, Babe recently presented me with the most golden Golden Gown I've ever gawked at...incredibly, a vintage Jessica McClintock Gunne Sax creation! I've named her Goldie...because she practically insisted!

Photos don't do her justice...she's really got to be seen to be believed! I like to think of her as sort of a mullet of a gown...respectable, simple lines up front...party in the back!!

So here's the front...she's strapless, floor length and, miraculously, just the right length as well!

Just look at the fabulous sequining!

Ok, now take a peek at the back!

Not only is there this fabulous bow closure that hides the zipper...

...but a fuckin' bustle!  I've lifted her skirt here so you can see the amount of tulle going on underneath!

And, of course...the label!

It says 5-6 but she's kidding...she's more of a 1-2...which is probably why she was orphaned in the first place. I can barely squeeze into her, and I usually swim in a 5-6...vintage sizing can be confusing. In any case, Goldie and I will be sharing the stage tonight during my vocal performance at ROCK-A-RAISE! 

Thanks, Babe! Mwwwahhhhh!

Rock-A-Raise!

We Seattle-ites may be all the way across the country (2852 miles from here to NY as the bird flies) but that doesn't stop us from caring about our friends on the East Coast, many of whom are still struggling after the devastation of Hurricane Sandy!

So I'm proud to announce that this Sunday night I'll be performing at ROCK-A-RAISE...a dance party and burlesque show dedicated to raising money for this worthy cause! In fact, 100% of the proceeds will be going to the Stephen Siller Tunnel to Towers Hurricane Sandy Relief and Rebuild Fund!

This event is going to be held at CHOP SUEY on Seattle's Capitol Hill...aaaand...I'm very excited to be sharing the stage with that Hot Hot Mess of Seattle Burlesque, the fabulous Mitzy Sixx!

Check out the TUMBLR link! My thanks to the producers for making me feel like a big-time celebrity! What a thrill!!

Merry Christmas!

A 'Christmas Gif' from me to you! Wishing all my pals a safe and happy holiday season filled with love and magic! XOXO

Find your favorite Christmas Gif here!

The Life Infinato

On this, the verge of the Apocalypse, the dawning of the Age of Aquarius...may I present...THE LIFE INFINATO...



This amazing, dreamy composition was created by my talented friend Joriah Goad......and say, did you recognize your ol' pal Gams?? I ain't gettin' any younger, darlings!

Anatomy of An Act

Hard to believe it's been 5 years since I graduated from Miss Indigo Blue's Academy of Burlesque...and so much has happened in those 5 years...I realized my dream of being crowned Belltown Betty, I produced my own one-woman show, and I celebrated my 20,000th day alive! So, to commemorate my anniversary as the one-and-only Gams Galore, I thought it would be fun to put together an actual burlesque strip routine, which I performed in last Friday night's Academy of Burlesque Alumni Show - The Beginning of the End!

I told the story of my BLONDE AMBITION...how I went from blah to blonde...from glum to glam...from frumpy to faboo...simply by putting on my beloved bad wig!

I gotta tell ya, kidz...singing is sooo much easier with sooo much less room for error! And much less preparation, too, I might add. Case in point are these notes I made while creating my act. Note how they start off nice, neat and well-organized...

...still looking pretty tidy and sensible...

...then things get a little more complicated...

Oops! Then the shit make no sense at all!!

I'm pleased to announce that it all came off without a hitch...literally and figuratively! And since every burlesque strip routine calls for an appropriate pair o' pasties for a final 'reveal', I created these beauties for my boobies! Sparkly!

Host Post

Hello my darling darlings! I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with food, fun and friends! As for me, I enjoyed my own annual tradition of going out for a couple pints of the strongest (around 9% alcohol!) seasonal ale around town, Maritime's Jolly Roger... and some good ol' fashioned fish and chips!

So while I was noshing away on my untraditional fishy feast, it occured to me that I never told y'all about my latest gig! For the last few months I've been the 'official' show host, aka Mistress of Ceremonies,  for Chameleon Productions...a fabulous troupe of burlesque and bellydance performers who put together a show every month at a local bar known as Dante's... a favorite U of W frat hangout since the 60's!

I just so happen to have a video from September's themed show, 'Mix It Up!' ...why don't you 'check it out'?


Next month is an Xmas theme, of course...entitled 'Tis The Season... and guess who got to design the poster??

Gimme The Finger

Yes, darlings...I'm afraid I've caught the dreaded NAIL ART bug...spending waaaay too much time watching tutorials and waaaay too much money on all the fabulous new polishes they have out this season! My favorite trend is 'Lone Finger'...the ring finger (with or without the thumb) with a different look than the rest...a look I tried out for Sunday night's MatchGame Re-bar! Since it was a James Bond theme, I did a Bond-esque mani with aqua animal print over silver, which I dubbed "Pussy Galore"...aaaand...featuring a "Goldfinger" with bronze animal print...check out my efforts!

Don't they look great with my ever-sensational silver leather trench?

Wunderbar!

Vintage Nina, darlings!


.....sigh!

Deux Parfums

Two signature fragrances by très fabuleux Ade...'Extinct'....



...take a whiff!

Guide to Gams

In case you aren't up to speed on your body language, remember...glamorous gams can tell a lot about a gal! Here's a handy guide for you connoiseurs, coquettes and Casanovas alike!

Danse de Dior

In this beautifully choreographed gang-bang of a Danse Apache, watch in awe as gorgeous Merian Ganjou gets bossed around and tossed around...yet still comes up smiling!

Here are the Dior Dancers, darlings!

Happy Halloween, Darlings!

MWWAHHHHH!

Dolls in Drag

Ooooh-lalaaaa!  I simply can't help myself from gossiping about a certain famous Blonde-Around-Town who's recently turned Drag Queen!!...according to my daily dose of Blonde Ambition......

...none other than....Barbie??....... and isn't she freakin' fabulous??

Drag Queen Barbie just-so-happens to be coming out this December, and I'd just like to be the first to say, Santa, I would blow you for a chance to see this bitch under my tree come Xmas morning! Me first! Me first!!

Have You Met Lydia?

 Happy Hump Day, darlings! Hope this brings a smile to your adorable faces today...Mwwwwahhhhhh!

Eroticise!

Slap on some spandex, my darlings...or in this case, just slip into some lacy underthings...pull out the ol' boombox, invite your hottest girlfriends over and let's get ready to EROTICISE!  Fitness was just so much sexier in the 80's, wasn't it?

In Memoriam

Darlings, I don't usually get too sentimental here on the ol' bloggeroo, but today I want to acknowledge someone very special who passed away yesterday...the day before her birthday...after a long and brave struggle with cancer...Heather Artena Hughes.

I've had the pleasure of working and laughing with Heather, aka Betty Sommers , on several episodes of MatchGame Belltown...where she's always brought a note of raunchy hilarity to Betty's 'cougar' persona. In and out of character, always a funny, warm and caring person who is obviously loved by many here in Seattle, especially those in the performance community.

Heather, Happy Birthday! Bless you...and may peace be with you! Your friends and admirers back down here in dumb ol' Seattle will miss you very, very much!!

Here's a clip of our Heather in that classic Seattle grunge-era movie, SINGLES...

 

Photo credit Gregory White

Wacky Wacky Waxie

Here it comes! Here it comes! The film I have been waiting..and waiting..and waiting for! It's my all-time favorite boylesque sexsation in his first feature length film.........Waxie Moon in Fallen Jewel!
This will be premiering at the upcoming Seattle Lesbian and Gay Film Festival in October...but thanks to your pal Gams, you can enjoy this fun and colorful trailer NOW!

Pinwheels!

Exclusively exclusive and definitely NSFW...just the way you like it! Yes, darlings...these are the freaks fine people I call my friends...

Knockers Up!

My pal Sam sure gives good gifts! The other day he gave me copies of two albums by a favorite comedienne of his from the 60's...a naughty-but-nice gal named Rusty Warren. I hadn't heard of Rusty before...surprisingly enough!...but this is what TIME magazine was saying about her back in the day...

"Comedians often specialize. Some toy with national politics, others with the race problem. Rusty Warren's field is sexual intercourse. A squarely constructed redheaded woman in her middle 30s, with the hoarse voice and hearty manner of a call-house madam, she talks about sex in clear, unsubtle terms. Her joke vocabulary is full of colons and ova. She discusses sexual failures, makes fun of women with abnormally small chest development, and moves from person to person in her audiences making clever references to the probable size of their genitalia. Some of her words are pretty old Collegiate Gothic, like horny and poontang. And she is billed as The Knockers Up Girl."

And I've gotta tell ya, I've been having so much fun listening to her albums Sin-Sational ...



...and In Orbit...

Maybe not quite as shocking today as in the 60s, but dirty talk and bawdy songs just never seem to go out of style, do they?

Our Founding Flounders

Well, lookee here! It's the MatchGame Founders Day Festival Edition...coming up this weekend as part of the Belltown Founders Day celebration...and guess who gets to be on the panel...and give a very special performance?? Why, it's Belltown Betty 2011-Gams Galore!...(that ravishing beauty!) And not only do I get to share the stage with Mr.Belltown...but also with some very special pals...like good ol' Gary Gloryhole!

Then, Sunday night features the 7th Annual Belltown Pageant...and alas, my darlings, this means that my reign is at its end and I must pass on the 'Presitgious' Belltown Betty crown to the next chump lucky contestant!

Stella!

Exciting news from the fabulous Stella Rose...New York loves her! Honestly, darlings...what's not to love??

Photograph by Steven Meisel

Where's My Sugar?

Yum! Blonde Ambition at its best, darlings...starring the only 'Vinila' I have a taste for...Vinila von Bismark!

Captain Jamie

Oh, and one more thing, loved ones...if you'd like to see the creator of those cute little aqua 'flight suits'...

...check out another uber-fabulous friend of mine, designer Jamie Von Stratton...on Perez TV!

By the time you get to almost  the end, you'll see Jamie wearing the exact same Captain Jamie uniform...with none other than the legendary Bob Mackie! Yay!

Scandal!

My pal Dr.Steve has been at it again! Through the magic of photo developing, innocent pics of local kids at play, taken around Belltown...including the night of my Grotto-A-Go-Go party, where he captured Fifi Kalamata leading the Conga line!...have developed into seemingly more scandalous snaps....Look!

Who I'd Like To Meet This Year

The kinky, the kitschy, the cornballs and clowns...

Pagans, performers and peers...

The oddballs, the outcasts, the out-of-the-ordinary...

Colorful crazies and queers...

The fetishists, faghags, the fearless, the fools...

Artists and anarchists, too...

People whose one rule is breaking the rules...

Oh...you know...people just like me and you!

HAPPY PRIDE!!
Photos swiped from Flickr...again this year!